Thursday December 23, 2010 notes
On Saturday the 18th my withdrawal symptoms hit their worst. I was completely frozen except for walking. My hands could not move, I could barely speak and for the first time I didn’t know what to do and I was feeling hopeless. Earlier in the day I began to cry and could not stop but didn’t know why exactly I was crying. Cody had come to see me that evening and we had a good visit; a very emotional but positive interchange. About 7:00 PM I decided to call Elaine Morris to have her help me do some JSJ. She agreed to help. She worked on me for two hours at which time I was moving again. That is, to the degree that I was before the extreme freezing set in. That night I was racked with whole body spasms most of the night. In the morning I took a Dilaudid which calmed down the spasms. I then slept most of the day until about 1:00 PM. My hands are still not moving well enough to function on my own. I went back to Elaine’s again. She did more JSJ for another two hours. I had another hard night though not as many body spasms. On Monday morning I had Tracy go get some Lobelia tincture to help with the body spasms. It seemed to help taking twenty drops at a time. I didn’t want to rely too much on Dilaudid since it is also habit forming. I went back to Elaine’s again and met Tdok. Elaine and I discovered through muscle testing that I had the trapped emotion of shame in my hands and I needed to release it in order to regain the movement of my hands with or without Dopamine. We used the Emotion Code method of 110 swipes with a magnet. I will continue to go to Elaine’s each day to have her do JSJ until I can do it on myself. I am noticing a gradual increase (very gradual) of improvement in all aspects of motor function. It seems that my hands are the last place that my body sends Dopamine for now. Last night I slept on Ariana’s bed to try to get through the night without waking up Tracy. Her bed is situated such that I can lay more comfortably and turn myself over. Her room is also quite warmer. So I need less blankets. I found that I rested fairly well. I woke up at 12:30, 2:30, 3:30, 5:30, and then got up at 7:00. Even though I woke up a lot I went back to sleep each time and slept fairly well until my body got too stiff in that position. I didn’t have as many body spasms and only used Lobelia. I’m going to increase the frequency of doses of Lobelia to every two hours to help the stomach cramping and the overall body cramping. I believe that the trouble that I have with swallowing is simply cramping of the esophagus and it is also a withdrawal symptom. I believe the JSJ is playing a big role in the speed and ease of my recovery. I will continue to have it done or do it everyday. My Dopamine system is still awakening and my muscles are still weak from the absence of the adrenaline I have lived on for ten years now. I am convinced that my slowness of movement is due to, in part, a mere general weakness of muscle tissue rather than a Dopamine deficiency. I have learned in my readings of Janice Walton-Hadlock that as I continue to recover my Dopamine system, it will be important to avoid extreme cold, any kind of infectious disease like a virus or bacteria and social stress. These three things are all big Dopamine depleters. By the way these last few posts I have had someone else typing as I am not able to unless I want it to take me three days. And thanks to my dear husband and daughter, I get dressed, bathed and fed everyday. I believe the worst of the non-function days are behind me.
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Friday, December 17, 2010
A Journey of One Day #7 Notes
December 17, 2010 Notes
I recently received a supplement called ‘Aquas’; a cell hydration formula. I believe it was developed by John Colemen of Australia, who recovered himself from Parkinsons. It’s a homeopathic formula which works on a cellular level in the body. I took the maximum dosage recommended on the bottle (7 drops) three times in thirty-six hours. I took a nose dive in function. The formula had triggered a release of toxins from my cells that now had to be processed. It was hard sliding backwards in function but I knew it would lift in a few days, and it did. So now my plan is to take the formula again starting with one drop. Homeopathics can be very powerful if used correctly. My goal is to get the most amount of recovery with the least amount of downtime in function. Today I saw a tiny bit of improvement in my motor function. I have been experiencing a flare up in my old nerve pain in my right leg caused from earlier back injuries. The new research shows that when you withdraw from these medications, the weakest part of your body is targeted with symptoms; but they are just symptoms only. I will continue to play cat and mouse with symptoms and help for the symptoms. When the nerve pain got too bad, I needed pain medicine. However, too much of this pain medicine could slow down my recovery process. Another acute symptom that is very painful is the abdominal cramping. I constantly feel like I have a ten-pound weight on my solar plexus. There is a drug that recovering addicts are prescribed to help with this which I took. I decided to research this drug (as I do with all drugs). What I found was that it is also an addictive substance that depresses the central nervous system. It worked well for the abdominal cramping but it will slow down my recovery process. So I called my herbal nutritionist guru friend here in Modest who has a health food store. He recommended a great herbal formula called “Herbal Muscle Cramp Formula”. It is also very potent and should be taken with caution. It is much easier on the central nervous system though and has worked well for the abdominal cramping. It is day 33 into my journey of going off of PD drugs. It has been 7 days since I took my last PD pill. Wow does it feel good to not live on a pill schedule. I believe now I will see a gradual improvement in function each day. It could take up to ten weeks; however, before I am done having withdrawal symptoms. I still have a lady come in everyday for five hours to help me. Hopefully I won’t need her too much longer. Tracy and Ariana are off work and out of school now until January 3. They take very good care of me. I actually went on three driving excursions with my helper to do some Christmas errands. I could drive ok, I just couldn’t get my seatbelt on by myself or get my money out of my wallet and I got very tired after the trips. So on I go.
I recently received a supplement called ‘Aquas’; a cell hydration formula. I believe it was developed by John Colemen of Australia, who recovered himself from Parkinsons. It’s a homeopathic formula which works on a cellular level in the body. I took the maximum dosage recommended on the bottle (7 drops) three times in thirty-six hours. I took a nose dive in function. The formula had triggered a release of toxins from my cells that now had to be processed. It was hard sliding backwards in function but I knew it would lift in a few days, and it did. So now my plan is to take the formula again starting with one drop. Homeopathics can be very powerful if used correctly. My goal is to get the most amount of recovery with the least amount of downtime in function. Today I saw a tiny bit of improvement in my motor function. I have been experiencing a flare up in my old nerve pain in my right leg caused from earlier back injuries. The new research shows that when you withdraw from these medications, the weakest part of your body is targeted with symptoms; but they are just symptoms only. I will continue to play cat and mouse with symptoms and help for the symptoms. When the nerve pain got too bad, I needed pain medicine. However, too much of this pain medicine could slow down my recovery process. Another acute symptom that is very painful is the abdominal cramping. I constantly feel like I have a ten-pound weight on my solar plexus. There is a drug that recovering addicts are prescribed to help with this which I took. I decided to research this drug (as I do with all drugs). What I found was that it is also an addictive substance that depresses the central nervous system. It worked well for the abdominal cramping but it will slow down my recovery process. So I called my herbal nutritionist guru friend here in Modest who has a health food store. He recommended a great herbal formula called “Herbal Muscle Cramp Formula”. It is also very potent and should be taken with caution. It is much easier on the central nervous system though and has worked well for the abdominal cramping. It is day 33 into my journey of going off of PD drugs. It has been 7 days since I took my last PD pill. Wow does it feel good to not live on a pill schedule. I believe now I will see a gradual improvement in function each day. It could take up to ten weeks; however, before I am done having withdrawal symptoms. I still have a lady come in everyday for five hours to help me. Hopefully I won’t need her too much longer. Tracy and Ariana are off work and out of school now until January 3. They take very good care of me. I actually went on three driving excursions with my helper to do some Christmas errands. I could drive ok, I just couldn’t get my seatbelt on by myself or get my money out of my wallet and I got very tired after the trips. So on I go.
A Special Visitor
I had the best Christmas visitors today!! Clair and Afton ! What a little beauty just like her cousin, Brielle. Her momma is looking fabulous too.
What a sweetie pie. Good work Clair. Love you both.
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
A Journey of One Day #6 Notes
I am seeing now that I don’t have any medication going into my brain, I can distinguish real movement from synthetically induced movement. I do the JSJ (Jin Shin Jitsyui) three times a day, and it always spurs more natural movement. I had a few minutes of perfect hand movement last night. I slept better than I have in the last four weeks. I also woke up with better hand movement than I have had in the last four weeks. As the day wore on I got slower again, and then after more JSJ movement picked up again slightly. I believe that proper meals, hydration, and positive thinking all play an integral role in my movement. I am feeling very sleepy and some muscle weakness, but it is not extreme. And usually if I sleep during the day, even for a short time, I wake up with good had movement. It only lasts sometimes for fifteen minutes or less but that’s ok for now. I will call this phenomenon HMWS (hands move with sleep). I find that I’m laughing more and easily. I’m enjoying the taste of food for the first time in years; meaning real food, not junk food. Now remember I have not taken any synthetic dopamine in 3 days. This is proof that my brain is re-awakening to produce native dopamine. It will take some time (not sure how much) for my muscles to learn how, or rather, remember how to use native dopamine. It’s all good. I feel it coming back to me. There are times when I’m doing JSJ, when my body is flooded with a sense of euphoria. I’m assuming this is dopamine and other neurotransmitters digging into forgotten territory- tired, atrophied muscles.
The human body is amazing…………………………
The human body is amazing…………………………
Monday, December 13, 2010
A Journey of One Day #5 Making Progress
It is day 31 into my journey to no drugs and no PD. I am now off of all medications for PD. My withdrawal symptoms have not been bad compared to some people’s experiences I have read about. My movement is still very slow. But I can still feed myself and go to the bathroom by myself. Thank Goodness! We hired a lady to come help take care of me during the day when I am alone, and to help with housework and meals. I am still doing weekly trips to Oakland for Bowen Therapy. I do daily Jin Shin Jitsyui Therapy by myself along with meditation and relaxation. The relaxation comes easy since I can’t do much else any way.
My feeling is that in a few weeks I will be moving again, pretty close to normal. Its still takes tremendous faith and self control to keep my fears in check. But on this score God has assured me that it will be as I have said.
I find that I am surprised that I am not more restless being constantly in the house. But I am actually enjoying it. This is due to the fact that my brain is no longer being driven by adrenaline. For probably the first time my body is learning to exist and move with all the correct brain chemicals. It could take another six months for my brain and body to be completely in sync. I also see how my thought processes are also now being triggered in the correct way. In the morning when I look at my face in the mirror I see softer eyes and they seem more real.
I shared my intentions of quitting PD drugs with my neurologist last week. I was pleasantly surprised at her reaction. She told me after I had explained it all to her that she thought it was reasonable. She asked me to stay in touch with her and report my progress. I thanked her for being open and for really listening to me. She said if she were in my place, she may do the same thing. She knows that I am the kind of person that needs to look for what’s best for me and my health and she said as my doctor she will be supportive and help me in any way she can. The big kicker here was when she said she would like to share my experience and knowledge with some of her other patients who are at about the same place I was in dealing with their PD. This made me very happy. Thank you Dr. Hansrote! I am keeping an extensive journal of each day during this process. This could be very helpful for others. It is how I was able to safely come to this point; by reading what others had done. I will be forever grateful to those individuals that were part of the Parkinson’s Recovery Project in Santa Cruz, CA. And also to John Coleman, a Naturopath in Australia for his work with Parkinson’s recovery. You could call these people pioneers of sorts.
I have come to the conclusion that one’s journey is always built upon another’s journey. That’s why we are here on this earth; to help one another along the way. I believe my journey will see brighter days ahead. I hope to be able to travel to Utah the first week of February when my grandson, Beckham, is born. My second grandaughter was born December 9. She is named Afton. These two sweet, noble spirits, being born at such a time, are a symbol of my ‘new life’ ahead. We’ll be starting out together!!
My feeling is that in a few weeks I will be moving again, pretty close to normal. Its still takes tremendous faith and self control to keep my fears in check. But on this score God has assured me that it will be as I have said.
I find that I am surprised that I am not more restless being constantly in the house. But I am actually enjoying it. This is due to the fact that my brain is no longer being driven by adrenaline. For probably the first time my body is learning to exist and move with all the correct brain chemicals. It could take another six months for my brain and body to be completely in sync. I also see how my thought processes are also now being triggered in the correct way. In the morning when I look at my face in the mirror I see softer eyes and they seem more real.
I shared my intentions of quitting PD drugs with my neurologist last week. I was pleasantly surprised at her reaction. She told me after I had explained it all to her that she thought it was reasonable. She asked me to stay in touch with her and report my progress. I thanked her for being open and for really listening to me. She said if she were in my place, she may do the same thing. She knows that I am the kind of person that needs to look for what’s best for me and my health and she said as my doctor she will be supportive and help me in any way she can. The big kicker here was when she said she would like to share my experience and knowledge with some of her other patients who are at about the same place I was in dealing with their PD. This made me very happy. Thank you Dr. Hansrote! I am keeping an extensive journal of each day during this process. This could be very helpful for others. It is how I was able to safely come to this point; by reading what others had done. I will be forever grateful to those individuals that were part of the Parkinson’s Recovery Project in Santa Cruz, CA. And also to John Coleman, a Naturopath in Australia for his work with Parkinson’s recovery. You could call these people pioneers of sorts.
I have come to the conclusion that one’s journey is always built upon another’s journey. That’s why we are here on this earth; to help one another along the way. I believe my journey will see brighter days ahead. I hope to be able to travel to Utah the first week of February when my grandson, Beckham, is born. My second grandaughter was born December 9. She is named Afton. These two sweet, noble spirits, being born at such a time, are a symbol of my ‘new life’ ahead. We’ll be starting out together!!
 |
| Afton 4 hours old |
Beckham ^shopping with Mom
MERRY CHRISTMAS !
Friday, December 3, 2010
A Journey of One Day #4 A few notes
Friday, December 2
I wake up moving slow, I get slower within two hours, It’s hard to fix my own breakfast but I do it. Feeding myself is very slow. I choke easily so I keep the foods soft or chew very well. I tell myself again and again this is temporary.
My main focus needs to be eating well, keeping warm, no anxiety causing situations, sleep, meditation and therapy (Bowen and Jin shin Jitsyui).
In three weeks I have reduced one drug by 75% and the other one by 50%.
My withdrawal symptoms have been mild so far. My brain is constantly working to adapt to these changes. I can see now how the available dopamine moves from the limbic area (automatic body functions), to the frontal lobe (thought processing), and to the motor area. As the dopamine enhancing drugs are reduced, my brain is awakening its own dopamine production. It takes time. No quick fix here.
My voice and word enunciation are affected by the drug withdrawal. In fact all the previous symptoms caused by the PD drugs become w/d symptoms; insomnia, severe muscle cramping (only in my rt foot). Other w/d symptoms are the chills and sweats, diaphragm constriction, erratic, traveling body pain, and bouts of extreme emotion.
I move better as the day progresses for small time periods. It will all improve more rapidly after I am off the drugs.
When I’m not doing all of the above, I pass the time by watching movies, listening to audio scriptures downloaded from lds.org, and documenting this experience.
I’m doing better than I expected. Keep praying for me.
My journey is not in vain. One precious day at a time, moment by moment, slow and steady wins the race.
Sending my love-
Mom/ Tracy
I wake up moving slow, I get slower within two hours, It’s hard to fix my own breakfast but I do it. Feeding myself is very slow. I choke easily so I keep the foods soft or chew very well. I tell myself again and again this is temporary.
My main focus needs to be eating well, keeping warm, no anxiety causing situations, sleep, meditation and therapy (Bowen and Jin shin Jitsyui).
In three weeks I have reduced one drug by 75% and the other one by 50%.
My withdrawal symptoms have been mild so far. My brain is constantly working to adapt to these changes. I can see now how the available dopamine moves from the limbic area (automatic body functions), to the frontal lobe (thought processing), and to the motor area. As the dopamine enhancing drugs are reduced, my brain is awakening its own dopamine production. It takes time. No quick fix here.
My voice and word enunciation are affected by the drug withdrawal. In fact all the previous symptoms caused by the PD drugs become w/d symptoms; insomnia, severe muscle cramping (only in my rt foot). Other w/d symptoms are the chills and sweats, diaphragm constriction, erratic, traveling body pain, and bouts of extreme emotion.
I move better as the day progresses for small time periods. It will all improve more rapidly after I am off the drugs.
When I’m not doing all of the above, I pass the time by watching movies, listening to audio scriptures downloaded from lds.org, and documenting this experience.
I’m doing better than I expected. Keep praying for me.
My journey is not in vain. One precious day at a time, moment by moment, slow and steady wins the race.
Sending my love-
Mom/ Tracy
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
